When the bride asks you to be her maid of honor, it’s quite an honor. However, let’s face it, it’s also a pretty big responsibility.
After all, the bride-to-be is telling you that you’re an important part of her life, and no matter if you’re her sister, an old friend, her cousin, etc., you shouldn’t take it lightly.
Sometimes, though, the maid of honor simply doesn’t fully comprehend what it means to be put in that position. There’s usually more to it than simply making a speech at the reception.
Luckily, in our time in NY / NJ videography creating wedding videos, we’ve come across many maids of honor, some who went above and beyond what the title calls for, some who did just enough, and some who simply didn’t deliver.
So, let’s go over what it takes to truly honor the maid of honor position so that the bride doesn’t live to regret her decision.
The maid of honor must be the bride’s support system.
We’ve been in NJ / NY videography for a long time, and brides-to-be don’t usually choose their maid of honor simply for her time management and organizational skills, although those do come in handy.
The maid of honor must often also be the major support system for the bride. Planning and executing a wedding are never easy tasks, and you can bet the bride will have a few moments where some emotional support or some advice is required.
So, be prepared to be a good listener. Be the shoulder to cry on if the tears start falling and try to bring a smile to the bride’s face when she could use a laugh.
Pre-Wedding day duties…
From there, the maid of honor should be prepared to help sort out some of the wedding planning details, whether that means visiting a venue, helping with decor details, choosing a wedding cake or a theme, etc.
The M.O.H. can let people know where the couple is registered and keep an inventory of gifts that the couple receives at any pre-wedding occasions, too.
As a maid honor, you’ll also often handle the details of the bridesmaids’ prep, including helping both the bridesmaids and the bride choose and try on dresses.
The maid of honor should make sure the bridesmaids know all the necessary details about pre-wedding events and handle getting them to the wedding rehearsal as well.
On top of that, the M.O.H. usually hosts the bridal shower and plans the bachelorette party.
On the big day itself…
On the big day, the maid of honor needs to make sure the bridesmaids get all their hair and make up done and arrive at the ceremony on time.
The M.O.H. is in charge of keeping the ring for the groom safe and must make sure the bride’s veil and train are in place before the ceremony, and then after she arrives at the altar.
As the maid of honor, you may also need to hold the bride’s bouquet during the exchanging of the vows and sign the marriage license as witness.
At the reception, the M.O.H. needs to be ready to help out with guests, which could mean inviting people to sign the guest book or showing them where their table is.
You may also need to collect gift envelopes and store them in a safe place, dance with best man, and help the bride change after the ceremony, if necessary.
If that does happen, the maid of honor must then become the guarder of the gown, making sure it’s safe until the end of the celebration.
Then, of course, there’s the toast, and in our experience in NY / NJ videography, the toast is the most touching part of many wedding videos. Check out our video gallery to see for yourself.
How to go above and beyond…
First off, sometimes the bride gets so tied up with all the festivities that she forgets to eat. So, one way to really impress as a maid of honor is to make sure she’s well fed and gets to taste everything.
From there, while the maid of honor usually can’t be everywhere, whenever you can help, help. Whether it’s going along for a ride to meet a vendor or to check out another dress, it will be greatly appreciated.
Also, sometimes bridesmaids don’t all know each other or maybe it’s just been a while, so you can take your maid of honor status up a notch by organizing a day beforehand so everyone can meet up.
Maybe you can even get everyone together to plan the bridal shower or bachelorette party and, as far as the bachelorette party, great maids of honor usually knock them out of the park.
You need to handle every detail including collecting funds, if necessary, transportation, food, lodging, activities, etc., so that the bride can just relax and have a blast.
You can also make the bride’s life easier and go above and beyond as a maid of honor by communicating every little detail about the entire event to the bridesmaids and anyone else you know so she doesn’t have to.
On the big day, try finding a moment or two for the bride and groom to step back, away from the other guests, so they have a chance to truly appreciate the occasion, and then, of course, be genuine and heartfelt in your speech.
One last tip: As longtime NJ / NY videography vets, trust us, you can take extra special care of the bride by creating a wedding day emergency kit for her, just in case something comes up.
For more on the kinds of items to include in this kind of kit, check out our post: How to Prepare the Perfect Emergency Kit For Your Wedding Day.
About Live Picture Studios: LPS has been impressing clients and competitors in NY / NJ videography for years. We specialize in creating cinematic wedding videos in NJ, NY, CT, and PA. At Live Picture Studios, we make memories magical.